‘Big Sam’ Allardyce has today revealed that his obsession with crushing his friends on Fantasy Premier League and a fear of having to do a loser’s forfeit were the main reasons behind his recent retirement from real management.
During an exclusive interview with the Daily FFB, Big Sam revealed that his relegation battle at Crystal Palace had been having negative effects on his fantasy team ‘Benteke Fried Chicken’, almost causing him to finish bottom of the Premier League managers’ private FPL league.
“Whoever finishes bottom of our Premier League managers’ private FPL league has to wear a mankini for the whole of the summer. The weekend of that win at Anfield, my FPL side Benteke Fried Chicken got just 24 points and I slumped to bottom. Can you imagine me going to Tenerife wearing one of those things?”
“Fortunately I managed to recover and Moyesie finished bottom instead, however next year I might not be so lucky.”
It appears that having such a close call with humiliation was the final straw in the former England manager’s decision to call it a day in the world of real football management, and he plans to use his free time wisely come August.
“I can’t wait for the new season”, he continued.
“The routine is gonna be; wake up at midday, eat leftover pizza from the night before, spend 6 hours studying my fantasy team and club fixtures, out for a few beers and a kebab, then repeat again the following day.”
“With all of my time and resources now being aimed firmly at fantasy football, I feel that 2017/18 could lead to big things for Big Sam.”